Wouldn't it be nice?

I'm sitting here looking at my cat Gatsby snoozing the afternoon away. How I envy him. He has no worries, no debts and lives moment to moment. People feed him, coo over how cute he is and generally make a fuss over him for no apparent reason. A little bouncy ball or dangling string makes his day. Can you imagine being able to live your life like that? Ah, to be a cat.

I finally had to break down and ask my mother for a loan to help bail us out of our financial crisis. She, of course, agreed...but I feel like a piece of shit for having to ask. I never thought my life would end up like this. I was smart and driven. I had ambitions and big dreams. What the hell happend? How did I end up 36, divorced once, and struggling just to feed my two kids? I want a do over!

The more I think about things, the more I just long for a clean slate. I want to fill up a building-sized black board of all my mistakes and regrets...then I want to blow the crap out of it! I want to look up and see an empty place - ready for me to start again without penalty or a trace of yesterday's ghosts. I want to run...and never look back.